Travis Steffen: Oh, I'm so excited for this episode because we actually haven't talked about this. So I don't know what you're going to say versus what I'm going to say. So this is going to be super fun. I mean, the first thing for me that I do is I have to recognize what is actually happening. That's it. I have to recognize that it is in fact a down day. In fact, when I work, I have an executive coach, his name's Jonathan. He's awesome. One of the first things that he asked me at the start of each call is how is your state of mind? And so I'll talk to him a little bit about that. And his next question is always, what are the repercussions or the potential repercussions of your state of mind today, whether it's good or bad? Like how could you be skewing your interaction with your team, your decision-making, um, you know, how you're placing your focus based on your state of mind. And just being able to know that that's what he's going to ask, forces me to think about it and recognize, okay, if it's a down day, like I could be making, you know, shoddy poor decisions or speed them up or something like that, or defer, uh, when I shouldn't, because I'm just not in that zone. Uh, and being able to know that that would be the case instinctually and proactively say, all right, now I need to flip the switch back on that's for me step one.
Joe Stolte: That's definitely like that's the awareness muscle, because a lot of times we are floating through life unconscious and life is sort of happening to us. I think one of the core of personal development and self care and the internal game is making that transition from, you know, uh, being at effect to being at cause where, you know, the world isn't just happening to you or you're happening to the world. Like you're the catalyst for what's going on. And, um, you know, some of us are just floating through life for years. I was floating through life, letting life happen to me. My state was driven by whatever was going on around me, whoever I was hanging around with whatever I was watching, reading, et cetera. And it's still true today. All those things still impact me what the difference is. Now I have the awareness muscle, like I'm, I'm aware of what my state is. You know, my kind of personal philosophy on this is, is you really only have two states. You have what I call a pain state and a power state. So pain states are like, you know, fear, doubt, indecision, anxiety, impression, jealousy, envy judgment, you know, in a power state is like joy, gratitude, happiness being thankful, energized, et cetera. And you know, the line of demarcation is pretty, pretty clear. And, you know, I could keep going in both of these buckets, but you're either in one state or the other. And when you're in a pain state, the first thing you gotta do is just get aware, right? I'm not, I'm in a bad place, right. Or I'm in a place that's not less effective. We can take the bad judgment out of it whatever, but the pain state, you know, you're not going to be your best self. Right. Right. And so I think that is the very first thing. And it's, it's easier said than done, right. Because, you know, even though we're talking about this and we're aware of it and we have this muscle, the vast majority of the day, I'm still blind to my state. I have to like, remember to trigger it.
Travis Steffen: 100% it is, it is definitely not a degree. Like you don't just have it. Right. You don't just have the awareness and forever have it. It's not a light switch, It's a practice man. Like, and it's, it's like, you might have it at one point in the day and then lose it and forget, just go on autopilot and then have to remember again. So like having prompts around, like for me, there's a, uh, prompt downstairs on my whiteboards a post it and it just says slow down, you know? And because one of the things that I'll do when I have like a down day is I will be so fast, like in terms of thought, to thought, to thought to thought that usually what I need to do is I need to slow down and really purposefully think about situations. One of the things that I've found was actually fascinating, you know, because in business, I mean, anyone who's watching this knows it's not all sunshine and rainbows, like there are going to be days that are bad.
Joe Stolte: No, it is rarely sunshine and rainbows. Yeah. Like where did he, Elon Musk chewing glass and staring into the abyss. It's not that bad, but it feels more accurate, right.
Travis Steffen: Elon Musk, right? Like he's a billionaire, if he's going to say that, like, what are these people that are just getting started feeling? So it's like, if you're in that state where you're like super confused or super frustrated or afraid that there's going to be an outcome, that's not what you, blueprinted it to be in your mind in advance. Um, one of the things that I've found to be super is like, I'll actually go, and this is, it might not be a popular tactic, but I found it to be helpful for me. I'll actually say, all right, what is my worst case scenario? Like what would actually happen? Like genuinely that would be bad because most of the time we spend 95% of the time worrying about stuff, 5% of the time it happens. And you know, when it happens, the instant it happens. We're like, all right. So what do I do next? So to be able to accelerate that for me and say, all right, what's the worst case scenario. And then I would just basically have a moment where I'm like, all right, let me get at peace with that really quick and figure out, okay, if this, if that actually happened, what would be the next thing? Um, how would I feel about myself? Who do I still feel like I'm, I'm capable of, of X, Y, and Z a hundred percent of the time the answer is yes. And, and a hundred percent of the time when I'm able to get okay, with the worst case scenario, I stopped worrying about it. Now it's just, all right. Relax and work the problem. You know, and they're going to be days where I don't have as much gas in the tank for sure. You know, and I'm very, very proactive about, you know, eating well and exercising. And it's like, non-negotiable self care and things like that regardless of what's happening. But there are still days where there's more gas in the tank than others.
Joe Stolte: Funny, you were saying like, how have a reminder, you know, like, like what's funny is like, if you, if you want a reminder, like get married because the minute like you get into a bad state and your tone of voice is off, you know, like I'm at home. My wife's like, yo, where'd that come from? Or what's funny is like, I'll do that. Like, I will unknowingly have a state shift almost entirely driven by something at work. I'm unaware of it. She'll ask me a question and I'll sort of give her like a tone of voice. That's like not my best self she'll react back to me. And I'll be like, yo, why are you tripping? What's going on? And that's what we do. We do a version of that all the time where we're, we're constantly like reacting and projecting. And then, we're unaware of where we're at. So that awareness thing is like, like that's huge. Um, one of the things that I've found too, that works really well to shift, uh, and I think what you just said was really insightful. It's like, well, one of the things I'll tease out of what you just said was most of the time, we are thinking about the worst case scenario. Okay. That that's a movie that you're playing in your mind, but inside of that movie, like you're the director, you're the writer, you're the actor, you're everything in that movie. And, and, and really controlling what's going on in that movie is within your own power. And so you are giving a tool where it's like, Hey, what's the worst case scenario. And then, you know, like mitigating or being okay with that and realizing like, well, it's really not that bad so I can turn the nightmare part of the movie off and that's a shift. Another way that I found, uh, that's a really powerful shift is, uh, you know, like gratitude. Like I sort of believe that gratitude is like, it's like the universal, unlimited credit line of the universe for it for more energy, for more positive energy to shift from a bad state to power state. And, you know, there's a lot of like cliches, like, oh, like pull out a list and write the things you're grateful for that tactic is cool, but it really is the intention that like, I want my state to be grateful. So what can I be grateful for? And so, you know, uh, you, you said you have a sticky note that says slow down. I don't have it anymore, but for like three years, I had a screensaver that said, what's great about right now. Nice. And so that way I'm like, Ooh, what's great about right now, I immediately go, what's my state. Where am I at? And how can I make it better? And the minute you flip into gratitude mode where you're where you're actually truly grateful, you can't be grateful, which is a power state and simultaneously anxious or depressed or frustrated at the same time. So if you can actually with intention, genuinely switch over into gratitude, like that's one of my favorite hacks for, okay, I'm in a pain state. I need to get into a power state now sometimes like you're in a rage mode right and that ain't going to cut it. Like there is no intention around, uh, uh, you know, Hey, I really want to get, what's great about it. Nothing is great. You know, you're kind of in this really terrible place. And I'll say that, um, you know, I don't get there very often, but it happens, you know? Like, and, and when that happens, what I've found for me personally, like I'm, I'm kinesthetic. Like I immediately am, I'm going to channel all of this energy. It's not rage. It's just energy into some pushups, or I'm going to sprint around the block or whatever. Like I'm going to go expend. Cause, cause what I've realized is like not energy in a woo woo way. Like I'm all spooled up. Right. And I got to do something with that and my body wants to turn it into rage and anger. So if I don't go expend that some way, you know, I can't even get my mind into a place where it's like, Hey, let's be grateful. So I have to like physically go let it out. You know? And for me, uh, for years that was breaking, you know, angry kids. So breaking was, I'd get all spooled up about something. I didn't know any of the stuff was not talking. So I would go dance. And like, that was like, what got me, what got me unschooled and put me into a good place. Yeah. Then, you know, now I'm an old man and my body's broken, but now I use my mind to do that, but I just wanted to point out, cause sometimes I talk about this gratitude thing and people are like, especially, you know, do is the guys are like, yeah, that ain't gonna cut it from me, bro. Like I'm on a different level of my anger or my frustration or my pain. So I'm just saying that there are other tools you can use, but that's one of my favorites.
Travis Steffen: So, you know, and I, and I think if, if, if you're watching, if any of you watching are in that realm where you're like, that's not going to cut it for me, it's I would challenge that pretty significantly. Cause I've been in that state of mind before I grew up in that annoyingly alpha hyper-masculine culture and it works, it works like I do it every single morning with one of my best friends. And it works like even if it's five minutes, um, it is a practice just like any other practice, not like a cure magic bullet where you flip that switch one time, it's going to make you feel a hundred times better it's but it's, it is, uh, an element of what makes you able to shift gears, you know? And one of the other things, I think it's important because I, when I talked about exploring that worst case scenario, um, so I also, this is going to make me sound so bougie. Um, I also work with a hypnotherapist and if you're wondering out there like, oh man, you got a therapist, you got an executive coach, you got a hypnotherapy, there are a million people working on me at any given time. Right? Yeah.
Joe Stolte: If you want to be world-class you look, look at Olympians, Olympians, have a nutrition coach, a psychology coach, a weight coach, a stretching coach, like sports psychology.
Travis Steffen: I try to treat business in that same way, you know? And it's like, so weirdly metaphorical, cause my first book is I was a professional poker player at the time. And it was about applying that exact like Olympian type mindset to poker. Right. But you can apply it to business. The science is the same. Started working with a hypnotherapist and one of the first things I started to explore with her, um, you know, while with my executive coach sometimes be like, all right, what's the worst case scenario. Let's make peace with that. I knew what she'd said. It's like, what if it all worked out well, would that be like, like walk me through it. And then inevitably we would create these, these mental scenarios that I would then explore through hypnosis that are, what if it all worked out and that's been like, uh, and I know that not everybody is able to actually work with a hypnotherapist and things like that. Um, but going through that mental exercise of just asking yourself that question can get you most of the way there and actually thinking about, okay, what if it all worked out? What if I do all these things and what if it all worked out? Even if the path there isn't exactly what you thought, like what would the, what will the outcome be like? And when things don't work in your favor, for example, and it all works out at the end of the rainbow, how much more proud of that path will you feel if you just did the right things one time and everything worked out per totally.
Joe Stolte: This has been, uh, an episode, a good episode. We hope, uh, if you guys want more information on mindset and more of this inner game stuff, make sure to email us firstname.lastname@example.org. Again, if you want to be on the show, if you have suggestions for people that want to be on the show, if you have feedback, hit us up, we're here to help you. And, uh, and of course we'd love to hear from you. So, and one more quick ask, make sure to subscribe to the podcast and leave us a review. If you're getting value out of this stuff, subscribe, leave us a review, helps us, uh, get the algorithm going, helps people know that we're not full of it and we can get more people listening to this podcast. So as always, we thank you and we'll catch you on the next episode. Thanks everybody. Okay.